Friday, December 31, 2010

2010 cheers.

50 degrees. last of the ice. last of the beer. for now...

the best part about a thaw is that SMELL returns as an available sense.

I just went through a mixpack of double/imperial IPA's...three were from colorado, interestingly enough. Lot of little upstart breweries out there, huh? It's kind of cute. Like, when Starbucks first came out and people thought it was fun to start coffee shops. Thankfully, here in MI, we have no coffee shops. just breweries. that have been here a long time.

Guess which one was the best? Ah yes, but of course, Founder's Double Trouble Imp. IPA. Michigan just makes better beer. Colorado should just stick to skiing in colorful clothes. They do that well out there.

that's the last IPA you'll see me drink for the winter. back to stouts/doppels/scotch ales.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

New year's nearly here...

This sums up everything i feel about this serious bitch of a past year.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Happy Holidays.

my xmas day challenge to all of my facebook friends is for Total Viewings of A Christmas Story on TBS's 24 hour marathon showing of the film. I'm currently at 1.5 views, going for 4 total viewings today. partial viewings DO NOT COUNT AT ALL. The winner is entitled to round of drinks at the bar of their choosing, up to two additional friends all purchased by the brokest person anyone knows: me!

i've also been offering up beers for movie trivia questions i.e.

what is the name of scut farkus' "toadie" sidekick in the movie? i think they say his name like once. no wiki cheating either, santa's job may be done, but that naughty cheating shit rolls over into 2011.

good luck all. after my run this morning, i'm hitting the eggnog like it insulted my mother and you can guarantee i'm gonna hit AT LEAST 4 total viewings of A Christmas Story. may the best man or woman win.

Green Monster Challenge

well this guy JT, whose blog i read because he lives in a place that's better for running than i do (and he drinks beer)...has presented an open Challenge for the 2011 year.

it involves these things:
Green Monster drinks. Gotta drink at least 100 of them in 2011. Maybe more like 103, to take it.

that's the link to this crazy canuck woman's blog all about these gross sounding smoothies. apparently it makes her "glow." but i think that has more to do with living a little too close to one of canada's 20 nuclear power generators.

anyway, i need something to do. so...

Friday, December 24, 2010

Holidazed and Mistletoe-ing the Line.

My brother is in town for the festivities. In his honor:

I remember when A-trak just used to scratch. Yeah, i know! I'm fuckin' old! and so is he!

Well, let's see here now uh...I've been off dat bad ol' methadope for about 6 days! Whoa almost a week! That also means i've gone almost a week without SLEEPING! how does he do it folks?!

-jerking off
-slapping own face
-saying things like "oh just fall asleep you dumb fuck."

occasionally if i take everything in the medicine cabinet that says "may cause drowsiness, especially when mixed with alcohol" and i combine it in a big punch bowl full of beer...i can get about two hours of sleep. then i reawaken, completely impervious to the boat load of cold medicines i just took.


i went to my doctor and i told him "hey, i know we don't get a chance talk much, buddy old pal, but lemme give you a brief rundown of my 2010..."

...debriefing (in the informative sense, i swear) ensues...

doc: "oh ok, yeah, we've got a little combo that we use for inmates that have to rapid detox before going to prison."
me: "does it involve hiding stuff in my asshole?"
doc: "no. it's a blood pressure medication to help keep your heart from crawling out of your mouth and also a high-powered, non-narcotic antihistamine you can double down on before bed to get some sleep."
me: (after disappointed pause) "that sounds great! i'll take it!"
dock: "lastly, i'm really surprised to hear all of this because i generally consider myself to be really sharp at noticing addictions. i had no CLUE at ALL! hahahaha!"
me: "ahhahahaha! crazy! this is crazy! it's crazy how long i'm typing this stupid conversation!"

apparently, i make a FUCKING AWESOME drug addict! i can't wait to put my skills to use once i get my hands on some high-test smack! kidding!

anyway, the worst worst worst part about withdrawals is trying to get myself to run. after all year of hard work, it sucks to get sidelined by something stupid for which you've no one to blame but yourself! bummer!

it's 6:00am and your junky body won't sleep anymore, do you know where your favorite beer is?

trick question, it's already on my cereal! YESH!

i swear i'll have a running post up soon. i just need my magic solar cosmic sundial watch to down transmit it's data to my little white brain...the one with keys on it that i stare into way too many hours out of the day. yesh.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

wiped out.

woman! woman! WOMEN??!!
or in other words, it'd be like calling it "The Leadville 100 foot-path nature stroll"

listening to Don Cornelius' voice with the bass WAY up is the only relief. Saturday 12/18/10 was the big day. I'm now 36 hours-ish with methadone and MY BROTHA LEMME TELL's super bad. ok ok ok. last video...GO!

aside from the stupid joking, all of those videos are worth watching/listening to. except for maybe methadone guy a.k.a. Mr. Obvious a.k.a. Debbie Downer a.k.a. I need to go shit again.

i love life?
i love life!

Monday, December 13, 2010

week beginning 12/6/10

after last week's very sudden deep-freeze, it seems that this year's winter is really here with a vengeance. it is not out of the question to have a snow-less christmas morning in the upper 30's/lower 40's... but this time i'm gearing up for a brutal season. michigan winters are characterized by very low temps, fairly high humidity and eternally lead-gray skies. we get very little of the consistent, high-quality snow of the U.P. (not that we have any hills to ski down), we don't have any of the beautiful, crisp clear sunny days like they have out in the rockies and the humidity tends to make the cold much more bone-chilling. i'm seriously not trying to bitch about it, but winters here really do grind on you. just the complete lack of sunshine alone tends to drive everyone crazy by about february.

all of that aside, i'm trying to be as proactive and prepared as possible. i've got my snow shoes all cleaned up and ready to rock. i found some hand-me-down XC skis and i'm hoping to find a pair of cheap (ideally free) boots ASAP. i have a pair of MICROspikes on order for my running shoes and, as a last ditch, i've got my gym membership to fall back on.

speaking of which, i've been joining my dad for aerobics classes at the YMCA a few times a week as some additional cardio to round out my shorter-than-usual runs. for the most part, i've been pretty impressed. i had pictured old fat ladies doing trunk twists and half-assed (or extremely full-assed, i guess) squats while listening to the "dance" version of jason mraz songs. unfortunately, some of this turned out to be true, but thankfully the classes are also some pretty damn good cardio and it's also giving my quads, abs, lower back and hamstrings a very nice beating. i think i may keep up on this classes all winter, just as something new to keep my workouts fresh.

lastly, the super cold running is getting slightly easier. the transition to winter is not nearly as painless as the transition into 95 degree summer days, but it does still happen. yesterday, i did about an hour of trail hill repeats during our first major blizzard of the year and i literally had chunks of slush accumulating on my eyebrows during the descents.

i've also been doing quite a bit more speedwork in the last couple of weeks. it feels good and i'm planning on keeping it up over the winter. i've never been very fast, so it's definitely an area i need to work on.

The most important part of winter living in Michigan is keeping your blood full of natural anti-freeze so as to prevent frostbite or, even worse, death!

finally, i think the methadone tapering has really turned a corner. i don't want to jinx it, but last week's step down from 9mg's to 7mg's was super hard but now that i'm at 6mg's...i feel fine, i think. my plan right now is to stay at 6 this week, go down to 5 on friday, let that ride for saturday and sunday, too and then...Quit. Yeah, Quit with a capital "Q." I think that I've gotten low enough in my dosages that i can finally stop the methadone with as little discomfort as is possible. as it stands, these low doses aren't really very efficacious anyway, so i'm taking that attitude that rather than draw out the withdrawal process unnecessarily...i am now at the point where i should quit outright. as this plan coincides with my first week of christmas break from work, i feel like i should be able to suffer a bit in private, take care of myself as best i can and weather the storm in as comfortable a situation as i can. i know it's still going to be pretty rough, but i think it won't be as bad as withdrawing used to be and i think i can pull it off. as i type this, the idea of finally being clean just makes me so excited and happy. man, i hope this works and i know what i'm doing...

weekly total: 52 miles ran, two gym classes, 4 days of weights and/or core work.

Sunday, December 5, 2010


ok... getting back on track now. update on the past two weeks:

I went on a furiously drunken and exhausting trip to new york city to see brother and friends for Thanksgiving. My mother celebrated her birthday. We all celebrated the welcoming bosom of Mama Alcohol. We rejoiced and were glad in it. We gave thanks. I had a nice run through Central Park one day, but the rest of the time I was hoofing it around the city with the family, seeing friends and checking out some of brother's favorite stops. Very busy trip, as usual. Lowest mileage week since last spring maybe? 37 total.

This past week has been horrendous. I do not rebound from a serious bender as quickly and smoothly as i used to. the methadone taper continues with only one extremely unpleasant hiccup the whole time. which is fine, i think. my heart rate is persistently elevated right now as i'm pretty much constantly in a low-grade state of withdrawal. it makes running mentally and physically unpleasant. i can't wait for this to be over. i felt especially brain-dead and shitty all week and got little done. even though it was a chore, i still ran a bit. i am pleased to have stuck with it and gotten in a couple decent workouts. total: 50 miles. a few sessions on the elliptical and/or stair master and one surprisingly tough aerobics class.

gabbo has had a bum knee for, like, totally forever. i was really happy to run with her today (sunday) even if it was only for a couple miles. i miss running with her and i know she's pretty pleased to finally have the end in sight regarding the slow rehab of her knee.